![]() ![]() En total había veinte apartamentos, cuatro por planta, y lo único que recuerdo es un edificio lleno de mujeres. “Viví en aquel bloque de pisos entre los seis y los veintiún años. ![]() It would be years before I learned that extraordinary focus, that excluding insistence, is also called depression.” ![]() The granite gray of the street, the American-cheese yellow of the grocery store, the melancholy brownish tint of the buildings were all still in place, only now it was the woman on the couch, the girl hanging out the window, the confinement that sealed us off, on which I looked with that same inner intentness that had always crowded out possibility as well as uncertainty. ![]() I could feel strongly, but I could not imagine. That child’s literalness of the emotions continued to exert influence, as though a shock had been administered to the nervous system and the flow of imagination had stopped. I could imagine no other than that which stood before me. These streets were all streets, these buildings all buildings, these women and men all women and men. I paid a kind of idiot attention to the look and feel of things, leveling an intent inner stare at the prototypic face of the world. I took it all so seriously, so literally. The grittiness of the street, the chalk-white air of the drugstore, the grain of the wooden floor in the storefront library, the blocks of cheese in the grocery-store refrigerator. When I was a child the feel of things went into me: deep, narrow, intense. “The imaginable had always been problematic. ![]()
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